Just say “Thank You”
“Thank you.” These two words are so simple and so powerful. They are two of the first words we teach our kids. “When someone compliments you, what do you say? ‘Thank you.’” And yet … What do we do as moms, as women? Is our response to a well-intentioned compliment to say “thank you?” So often – too often – we choose self-deprecation in place of the response that we’ve taught our children. Stay with me.
“Katie Lee, wow - you are great at riding your bike!” “Thank you!”
“Henry, I’m so proud of how you wrote your name!” “Thank you!”
“Amanda, you were so strong in class!” “No really – the tube I was using was just old and stretched out.” (If you are a FIT4MOM mama, you know what I’m talking about with the stretched out tubes!)
Why do we do this? ALL of us – we choose to put ourselves down or laugh it off in response to a compliment. Did someone just say she looks great? “No, trust me – it’s not me, it’s just these amazing jeans.” Did you compliment her on her ability to get so much done and with such grace? “No, really it’s just an illusion. My house is always a wreck!” We all say these things, and yet we tell our kids to just say “thank you” when someone gives them a compliment.
When you do/look/act/say something that catches someone’s attention and they complement you, acknowledge it the way you would want your child to (after all, they are watching and listening!) – what do you say? Thank you. Teach your kids that it’s okay – dare I say wonderful – to do something well and to thank the person who acknowledges it. We want our children to be confident and to feel good about themselves and to be kind to others, so why do we put ourselves down in response to positive comments? Sure, we could all do some things better – but that does not take away from all the things that we do well!
So the next time someone compliments you on a job well done, or how hard you’ve worked, or how you handled a difficult situation, say the simple, appropriate response – the one we teach our kids: “thank you.”
Try it with the strong women sweating next to you in a FIT4MOM class this week!